"What gives me the right to talk to you and teach you about Avoidant Personality Disorder?"
I am not a professional therapist, counselor, or any other kind of licensed professional.
If you were a smoker, drinker, or used drugs, and wanted help with kicking the habit, who do you think would be the best person to go to for that help?
Someone that has never touched a drop of alcohol, smoked a cigarette, or used drugs?
There was once upon a time a guy, we will call George, walking up the road. There was a hole in the road. George did not see the hole because he was on his cell phone, so as he walked over it, he fell in.
For a few hours, George tried as best he could to get out of the hole, but couldn’t get out because it was pretty deep. It started raining and the hole started filling up with water. George was also starting to get very hungry and thirsty.
George started panicking and called out for help. A doctor heard him, and walked up to the hole. George, looked up out of the hole and said:
“Doctor, I have fallen in this hole and I don’t know how to get out. Can you help me please? The doctor stood there for a minute, scratched his head, pulled out his prescription pad, and wrote out a prescription for some pills. The doctor threw the prescription at George. George picked up the paper and said;
“Doctor, what am I supposed to do with this?
I am stuck in a hole and I need help getting out”.
The doctor said “Take 2 of these pills every day for 3 weeks. If the symptoms persist, come back and see me.”
At this the doctor walked off.
Gorge crumbled up the prescription in frustration and threw it into the water that was filling the hole very quickly.
George started calling out again;
“Can someone help me please?”
A therapist heard George’s plea for help and came over to George. George looked up at the therapist and said;
“Can you please help me? I have fallen into this hole and I can’t get out.”
The therapist looked at George and the hole. The therapist said; “I am very sorry that you fell into this hole. How does being in there make you feel?"
George said, “Im in a hole, how do you think I feel?
The therapist then said; “Let’s talk about your relationship with you parents and how they made you feel about this hole you are in now. “
George then started to think about his mom and dad. His relationship with his dad was not a very good one and his parents had in fact divorced. George started to think that maybe it was his fault that he was stuck in the hole not able to get out.
George was just about to start talking about it when the therapist said “I am very sorry, but we are out of time for this week. If you wish to continue, please call my office tomorrow and make an appointment with my secretary. We can then pick up where we left off. And by the way, sessions are $150 per hour."
The therapist walked off, as he had a very busy schedule and was late for his next appointment.
At this George became very depressed because he did not make that much and knew that he could not afford this. Besides, if he did not get out of this hole soon, he might not even be alive next week.
George started calling out again.
“I am stuck in this hole. Can someone help me please!”
Someone soon came by, hearing the plea for help, and walked over to George. The man said;
"Hi, my name is Phillip, how can I help you?"
George said; "Phillip, can you please help me get out of this hole?” Phillip looked at the hole and jumped right in the hole with George. George said; "Phillip, that was really dumb. I need help getting out of this hole, but now you are stuck in here with me."
Phillip replied and said; “George, the reason I jumped in here with you is because I have been in this hole before.
I know what it’s like to be in this hole and I know what it's going to take to to get out!”
The moral of the story is that if you are stuck in the hole that is Avoidant Personality Disorder (Avpd), you need someone that has had Avpd, and has found the way out of it!
The book below journals my struggle with Avpd and how I found that way out.
We offer couching sessions. In these sessions, ask anything you wish. We will work with you to find the path you need to overcome Avoidant Personality.
The book is not ready just yet, but when it is, it will help you by giving you real examples from Phillip's life, and then follow that up with practical teachings and ways you can deal with Avoidant Personality.
Advocare are the Happy Pills that I found that helped me tremendously. They do not cure Avoidance, but they did take the edge off from my Avoidance.
Avoidant Personality Research & Teaching Center
PO Box 1471 Eagle Idaho 83616
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